Whole

as life lengthens each obstacle strengthens.
less control over the thickening emotions,
all for someone who created a divide in what should be whole.
his words eat at my thoughts,
his gaze depletes my mode of motion,
his smile triggers confused emotions,
happy to see him elated and angered to see him well.

as life lengthens each milestone strengthens.
how can i remove the scarring from his actions?
how can i separate his persona from that of everyone else?
do i continue to pretend it hurts less as time may progress?
smile brighter, show less to hide my distress?

i have a divide in what should be whole.
still stuck on what should have been done months ago.
he makes it look easy, puts on a show with grace,
i've done so well until i see his face
doing what i love and speaking with might
till his presence is felt and past familiarity becomes fright.

i have a divide in what should be complete
gave so much love and now im left in defeat
he is yet to understand how much he has stolen
my world is sound till he appears and it's frozen
im no longer able to pretend,
i really could never be whole again.

-Anonymous